Wait, slow down, how did it get to
be 2012? I'm turning 23 in a couple days? You've got to be joking. Maybe its
the fact that I've been living at home the past few months, maybe its that I
still won't be able to live without my parents financial assistant (welcome to
the baseball world!), maybe its because I still get mistaken for a high school
kid, or maybe its the fact that I haven't taken a second to not live up every
moment of my life since high school. Whatever it is, I just can't wrap my mind
around the fact that I've entered into the 'real world.' I feel under-equipped
and unable. Where did the past four years go? I thought I'd have more time to
prepare myself! I'm not saying I'd trade any of my life experiences, go back in
time and slow things down a bit. All of these experience have made me the
person I am today. Its just that now, more than ever before, I'm
lost/unsure/overwhelmed, etc. as to where this world is taking me and who I am
wanting to become. But it sure has been an ever exciting journey to figure
myself out.
Everyone says now is the time to go
out there and accomplish those dreams, you're young and determined. Take it
while you can. And that's what I'm doing, moving across the country to follow
my new dreams next week. NEXT WEEK! But watching friends around me selflessly
sharing their lives with a significant other or even starting their own
families, I find myself wondering if I did something wrong along the way to not
want that at this point in my life. Because I want/need to find my own way, I
wonder sometimes if I'm being selfish. I won't consider sacrificing my dreams
for anything. In a way I have been selfish. Keeping
myself constantly busy last year left me with precious little time to connect
with those who truly care about me. And possibly made me a little too wrapped
up in myself. One of my new years resolutions is to slow down and make
relationships rather than personal experiences a priority. I want to be the
friend my friends have been to me. Honest, supportive with unwavering dedication,
constant interest in my life (even in the little things), and one who lets
others realize how much they are needed in their life. So here's to a new year
and making changes for those who are most important to me. For me, I want 2012
to be the year of stronger relationships.
That was a great post, the sentimentality is very familiar to me. It's just like, whoa...where did all the time go? When did that happen? I did that!? Boggles the mind a bit and puts a sense of nostalgia in life. But good stuff either way.
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